hatakama inakataa kupublish… kweli EXPERIENCE ni mzuri

I thot at some point we all know how 2 shuka from a moving mat pretty safely, or atleast wen its moving slowly.. wat I saw the other day eh eh eh!

This iz wat happened:

Now am heading 2town from jobo, tired and all so I end up in a mkate, u know, thoz ma3z with kichwa and mwili separate… (I know y’al v gon lyk WAAAT .. chil chil) ma3z were scarce, adding with our Kenyan traffic jam and twaz getting kynda late so I had 2 fika tao by any means.. (u c, I knew you’d understand..)

So we’re moving mdogo mdogo thru’ jam and we fika Stadii and poeple are shukaing with jam.. ofcos Ujo anaday-dream, not bothered with the happenings…

samwea in my mind I see this chic shikiliaing the bars of the mlango as if her life depended on them.. Ah! now something interesting, so it gets my 100% attention.. am watching.. watching.. Now the mat is moving seriously slow and people hve been shukaing, its now her turn.. The dere ongezas speed kidogo but stil she culdav shukad.. The Konda is waiting outside, he notices she won’t shuka easily…. ma3 is stil moving mdogo… jam has opened up… motiz are now gearing up to go through roundabout… Konda iz not going to let dere down… spilt second…

WWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAiiiiiiiii waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaai!!!!!!!!!!!

The scream slices the air and my ears pamoja… She’z frantically pulling at the air while trying to step down nje. Problem is she wants to shuka while facing mbele towards kando ya barabara and obviously that aint going to happen as far as Physics is concerned.. The konda decides to ‘stabilize’ her, he grabs her shoulders while he’z still clinging to the door of the mat thats moving faster… he does a pretty good job coz she didn’t fall.

As soon as she’z down,she ‘chomokaz teke, no-one else saw wea she went!’ We all give a sigh of relief. Now is wen guyz in the mat start laughing.. The truth is I feared she’d fall and that waznt going to be such a good sight.

And ati I thot we all knew how 2 shuka wen mat is moving? kweli, kuishi kwingi, kuona mengi. After me started giong to skul alone with my bro in Class 5, till leo, am shua I cant fall from a moving mat. I’ve never been the risky type to attempt shukaing at full speed lyk my peers, buta slow moving mat shually il never fall. Never!

( for ya’l hu dunno for a reason or another, …I understand) .. this is how we be doing: To alight from a moving ma3, u have to be facing mbele, where the mathree is going. Start with your left foot kwanza and shuka lyk you were running facing infront. Don’t doubt you step, there are no 2nd chances. Just go, but make shua you run mbele, so that you move with the same momentum with the mat, which will otherwise make you fall. And experience is the best teacher at the end of the day!!!

mbarikiwe mkipractice he he. You’l be hearing more from me. til then au revoir!

‘ my heroes..’

Some thingz just make me happy! I don’t know if im crazy yet.. coz of the way I think,

…Like when a bunch of Somali village boys, straight from the shamba, decide that them now, they are done with hussling small-tym, chungaing cattle, nini-nini and …its TIME FOR CHANGE! …CHANGE THEY CAN BELIEVE IN! And they go, defying the whole world, and pirate some Titanic of a ship, Mugabe-style ( where the more ‘mwanaume’ you are, the more money you make!) Talk about “…the real warrior… real warrior… real warriah!

…Or this time were in a dance competition and a pal o’ mine shouts ‘…PONYOKA NA PICKUP……!’ at the top of his voice, at this chick on stage who iz rapidly (and violently) shaking her dweegy (ass).Up to now i’ve never really understood what her dancing had to do with  Kuponyoka na pick-up …Guess evryone has their own *mad* moments.. ama vipi?

…And this other time I am walking inside  Muthurwa market jioni and I come across this guy guy selling teddy bears. He had so many on display, that there waz one he had hung by its ear… reminded me of thoz kuchunwa maskio dayz of  nusery school kidz that we did. I dunno if that waz a PR strategy or just marketing, but me thinks stuff like this is what makes the genius to be given that title. (with better re-invention and packaging ofcos!) Funny coz I seemed to be the only one who noticed… Typical Kenyans.. alwayz on the rush! Someone must have seen me laughing and labelled me *mad* but maybe I am… I need to be told when Im a bit over the edge…

And thats why everyone should read my blogs and keep me in line.. Still new here and trying to unedrstand all this computer/ internet jargon… how do i post a link, what are all these abbreviations? Am I supposed to cramm them? lyk the back o’ my hands? (which myt get them in my kichwa upsyd down naaaah. I think I’l pass) How do I know when  other bloggers have posted something new so I dont have to wander ovyo ovyo kama braa (that’s NONINI’s line, dont blame me) … and coming to think of it, what in God’s name do these terms; LMAO LMFAO LOL mean? How many of you know, anyway?

…Kwanza ana’a chick wrote that LMFAO!!! thing on my wall on facebook after I had chokozad her and I thot amenitukana. I never talked to her again… din’t know how to react. I thot it must be L little M atha F *** A something O something !!!     (Yeess,  she added exclamation marks… 3 in total. Now u see where I’m coming from?)

Lol! Ah! That one I know  like…that-one- for-2008… anyway, another pal chanuad’ me and told me its Laugh Out Loud! yeeaah.. Most o’ yo dint know that ha ha ha! So I aint so bad me-self he he!     Before the ‘comb’ I had come to 3 conclusions:

LOL: 1. comes from the word Wololo-lol-o Mayeee! My Luo may be amature but I know that is exclamation, just like Ghai! or OMG or swahili Aiya-iya-iya-ya iya!

2. Lol! …like a lallipap.. Yep! borrowed from the Lil-Wayn himself,…high on weed.. anyway, that was theory 2.

3. Aaah! I’ve forgotten theory 3… SO, thats me and me challenges. All o’ yo Plzzz woiye add me name to your blogroll. Laterz!

..AND I tried to ‘re-construct’ that teddy, must av looked something like this… If I’ve exaggerated, my bad..!

...thats the closest to the teddy i could get Lol!

to my BABY SIZ..

This is for my sister

Who is but I’ve never had

Who lives but I’ve never met, before

I love you, I know I do

I wait for the day when

I can hold you, hug you, kiss you,

feel your beautiful face and radiant smile

Tell you of my boy challenges and listen to your sweet16 love stories

Console you when the boy broke your heart

Give you a shoulder to lean on

and feel so happy for you when youre in love

Watch you grow from naive teenager to sophisticated adult

Be a threat to any boy who crossed your line

and made you sad

Share with you my deepest heart’s desire

And see you understand me better than anyone could

Be proud of me when I get my first girlfriend

and tease me for ‘growing up’

And when I’m heart-broken,

Be very and genuinely concerned

And tell me sweet words of encouraegment and love

Tell me you love me and that my pain is your pain

And sound honest when you say this.

And then I tell you that I love you so very much

And would not know what to do without you

And thats why I write this poem

To my dearly beloved beautiful baby siz

Who I have never met

But cant wait to meet you and catch-up on so much

1 day, 1 time, I will never lose hope

1 love you baby gal

a new DAWN..!

When destiny comes calling, you dont put the call on hold! You dont let the phone ring for sometime before you pick the call! You dont leave your phone on silent mode! You never look back at what you may have to leave behind! You pick up yourself and, run to it as if your life depends on it (it does anyway).. You take that leap of faith into the unknown.. you risk it all for the sake of destiny, you let go! (freefall) and you make sure you enjoy every second of it. Savoir the moment. Its what ‘life’ is made of: RISK. Just like an eaglet has to be thrown outside the net by its loving mum inorder to learn to fly.. and if this does not take place it would then never experience life as an eagle does…

I have come to realise that destiny is calling me. Today, now! At this very moment. NO PROCRASTINATION, NO MORE LAXITY IN MY COMFORT ZONE, NO MORE FEAR OF THE UNKNOWN, NO MORE TIME FOR OTHERS FIRST-UJO SECOND! I have to learn to be ruthless with my time and my mind. I have to do me first before others. I have to think on my own before I follow the majority. WHY? because its my destiny I chase after, and not of others, otherwise I may end up like every body else_ but my vision is different. My mission is clearly thought out and stated to me. I know what I want! Very many people will ask why I do what I want to do, and why I just dont conform to the norm like all the others before and after me, why I cant just fit into the system like everybody else.. They will never understand me. I am not everybody! I am Eugene. There is only one me in this world, my destiny in this short life is mine and mine alone, i cant share with anyone.. everyone has theirs to follow, but few ever get there!

Yes, I have my own VISION 2030, and I am soo going to achieve it. This is what seperates the greats form the all the others. The 5% that make history, to be remembered in time memorial,  in this world- they definately never fitted with the majority in terms of actions and thinking! They were their own men and women.

YES I CAN. and I will. I will have to learn to balance the art of nourishing the Body, Mind and Soul. I will reach Nirvana.I will get there.

the BLEEDING ME

I brave it on the outside

While inside i’m dead

Its like falling down a cliff in slow motion

And the worst part is that i didn’t know I was falling all along

Until THUD! i hit the rock..

Long after she had thrown me under

And forgotten all about me

WHY? How could she be so heartless insensitive?

I trusted her.

Sometimes truth supercedes heartbreak..

And yet she chose to keep me in the dark

Until now when I demand to know,

She takes the life away from me

And leaves me DEAD.

.: I’ve Moved On!! :.

You can now catch me on http://www.eugenesportfolio.blog.com You can follow me there, thanks!!!

See You !